Wednesday Walk

"Fear not, God has heard the voice of the youth where he is."
Genesis 21:17

I am so glad that I know now that God will meet me where I'm at. I don't have to go searching for Him--which I have done in the past, sometimes with less then optimal results. And I've noticed that the harder I try to find Him, the more confused I usually become (because, of course, my mind is usually filled with need, sometimes panic, and I want to hear from Him right now). But if I grow still, if I fill my mind and heart with faith, I can hear Him. And the longer I stay in that place, the stronger I grow. I'm going to spend the next week trying to increase the amount of time I can remain quiet and still in His presence.

LID!!!

China has issued a log-in-date for my paperwork: February 16, 2012!! My agency has requested expedited service, due to Noelle's heart condition. So, we are right on track for travel after the trade fair--I'm thinking about May 5th. It's also possible we could travel earlier, perhaps just prior to the trade fair's opening in mid-April.

The trade fair is a very large production and hotels in my daughter's province were reserved as much as a year in advance, so it would be difficult if not impossible to travel during the two weeks this is going on.

I know God is all over this and that we will travel in His perfect timing.

Wednesday Walk

This week's topic: When someone you love is sand paper.

Sometimes a relationship like this can last a lifetime; sometimes it's a colleague or a distant friend you share space with infrequently--just enough to think, I've got to get away from her.

But it's all part of God's plan, to make us better people. I know I certainly had patience to cultivate. And I am not 24/7 on the look out to bless others--I wish I was, but sometimes I get so wrapped up in my busy life, I don't always think to look up. I'm still working on this.

My sand paper loved one is a daily experience and there are times I truly feel that all my rough spots are smoothed out and so whatever we're going through must surely be for the benefit of this loved one. But I guess not--I got a particularly good rub down this past week:) And after several days of pondering my own perfection I was reminded that I have a few areas where improvement is mandatory if I want to experience God's Grace in Its fullness.

In the Garden

We headed out to the garden yesterday. I'm very happy with our little plot. We don't have the best water in San Diego, and we're far enough outside the city that we have pretty bad soil, too. So, it's taken a few years and some experimentation to achieve any sort of success.

The girls were really into it, for about an hour or so.

Then they disappeared. . .

But the new plants were in, right next to our thriving lavender.

Ceramics

Uncle Billy sent a a very generous Christmas check for the girls. As last year, I took the girls to a place where they can paint their own ceramics. The love doing this, but it is rather pricey. Thanks, Uncle Billy!!

Wednesday Walk

This week my walk topic is "Living in God's Economy."

Living this way looks nothing like the world economy and it has some people around me worried, some almost critical.

Everyone's values are different and this is not a commentary on anyone's life but my own. This is part of my story, my growth and I'm writing about it more for my benefit than the benefit of others.

Some of the things I live with/without that seems to bother others (and many people don't mind making unsolicited comments:)):

I touch-up my roots myself and the last time I had my hair cut, I was a hair model for a graduating beauty school student and got a really nice cut for free. I don't actually advertise this information, but when someone asks about my hair, I tell them. Back when I lived in the world's economy, I paid to have my hair done every 6 weeks. But it doesn't bother me, doing it myself. At all. And I get compliments on my hair all the time.

I had a daily Starbuck's habit prior to kids. Now, I'm never in the place unless someone's given me a gift card. Not only do I not miss it, I've found that I don't like it--well, except those gingerbread lattes:)

I pick up my clothes when I'm in CostCo or Target shopping for groceries or household things. I prefer to get my jeans second hand. I don't think I've spent more than $600 on clothes for myself in a single year since I've become a mom. When I buy new, it's on sale. Currently, my purse is one I snagged from the girls' dress-up box. Now, clothes have never been a big deal for me. Jeans and a comfy sweatshirt or sweater are my preferences, and fortunately I can wear those to work.

My car (already referenced in a previous post--late November or early December?) is 14 years old and I admit that it made me nervous. But as a friend recently pointed out, a new car could give me trouble as well. Cars were a weakness for me. I had this irrational fear of being stranded on the side of the freeway, but God showed me back in October that He's right there with me. And He was with us in the AZ desert, too. He showed me I need not fear car trouble. And I'm finally listening. I am so glad I am free of this burden. In truth, I really like my Volvo wagon. I just don't like that it costs so much to fix. Still, even with replacing the transmission two months ago, the repairs and maintenance on my car is less than the cost of buying a new car. Some years, it's much, much less. My car is comfy and safe and I'm hoping it lasts me three more years.

My house is 1290 square feet. I guess that seems small to many people. And it's true, we need to add on at least one more bedroom. A play room or family room would be nice, too. But I love my house. It's quiet here. We have lots of natural light. Our diningroom is big and we have a long rectangular table that seats all of us easily (and with the leaf, fitting a few more kids would be no trouble at all).

Travel. Or lack of it. Now, this does bother me some. I want us to have great family vacations, building our memories and closeness. Before our trip to AZ two weeks ago, we hadn't gone anywhere in three years. Then, we had gone to a a family reunion in Montana and it was great. I would love to get back to the east coast and visit family and show my kids American history up close. I'd like us to travel up to Oregon every summer to visit my brothers and my uncle. And there are many other destinations I'd like to explore as a family. For now, though, I am content that we are going to China soon, and while an adoption trip is no vacation, this will be a huge family event, building memories that are priceless.

I suppose I'd be rolling in the dough if I didn't have a heart for the orphan, the widow, for those with disabilities, but my life would be fruitless, barren, and a very sad and pointless existence.

And we are known by our fruit. I much rather it be known that I help where I can.

I have grown a lot and need a lot less to be happy. Family and following through on what God places on my heart are the only importance in my life. He has a plan for each and every one of us. Often, it's not what we would have chosen for ourselves, but it is something much better.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

Sunday Catch-Up

I skipped my Wednesday Walk this week. In fact, I totally forgot about my weekly reflections on my walk with God until Thursday morning . Not that I haven't been talking to Him, praying and praising--I did plenty of that during our weekend away--I can't begin to describe the battle I had with fear as I approached the 6 hour drive back home through barren desert with a car that had acted up upon our arrival in AZ and my precious babes counting on me for their safety. However, by the time I was 40 minutes into tumble weed and seguro, I managed to lay every fearful thought captive unto the Lord. Much praise there!!

And then on Monday, there was the nerve-wracking dental visit for the girls (Maddie always gets traumatic blisters inside her mouth when she has her teeth cleaned and she has just come off of 19 months of constant blisters--due in part to what I have discovered is a food allergy. . .)which included the discovery that Maddie has 11 teeth coming in -- 7 year old and 12 year old molars all coming in now.

And one of my students, whom I have had in my case load for 3 years, is very ill. I am praying the round of chemo she had is working, but she doesn't look well and as of this writing, has missed school the past 3 days, which is unlike her.

All of this mixed into my daily walk kept me in near constant prayer and praise.

But I know He is working and that all things will come together for our good. It's so wonderful to finally be in a place that is free of doubt.