Wednesday Walk

This week my walk topic is "Living in God's Economy."

Living this way looks nothing like the world economy and it has some people around me worried, some almost critical.

Everyone's values are different and this is not a commentary on anyone's life but my own. This is part of my story, my growth and I'm writing about it more for my benefit than the benefit of others.

Some of the things I live with/without that seems to bother others (and many people don't mind making unsolicited comments:)):

I touch-up my roots myself and the last time I had my hair cut, I was a hair model for a graduating beauty school student and got a really nice cut for free. I don't actually advertise this information, but when someone asks about my hair, I tell them. Back when I lived in the world's economy, I paid to have my hair done every 6 weeks. But it doesn't bother me, doing it myself. At all. And I get compliments on my hair all the time.

I had a daily Starbuck's habit prior to kids. Now, I'm never in the place unless someone's given me a gift card. Not only do I not miss it, I've found that I don't like it--well, except those gingerbread lattes:)

I pick up my clothes when I'm in CostCo or Target shopping for groceries or household things. I prefer to get my jeans second hand. I don't think I've spent more than $600 on clothes for myself in a single year since I've become a mom. When I buy new, it's on sale. Currently, my purse is one I snagged from the girls' dress-up box. Now, clothes have never been a big deal for me. Jeans and a comfy sweatshirt or sweater are my preferences, and fortunately I can wear those to work.

My car (already referenced in a previous post--late November or early December?) is 14 years old and I admit that it made me nervous. But as a friend recently pointed out, a new car could give me trouble as well. Cars were a weakness for me. I had this irrational fear of being stranded on the side of the freeway, but God showed me back in October that He's right there with me. And He was with us in the AZ desert, too. He showed me I need not fear car trouble. And I'm finally listening. I am so glad I am free of this burden. In truth, I really like my Volvo wagon. I just don't like that it costs so much to fix. Still, even with replacing the transmission two months ago, the repairs and maintenance on my car is less than the cost of buying a new car. Some years, it's much, much less. My car is comfy and safe and I'm hoping it lasts me three more years.

My house is 1290 square feet. I guess that seems small to many people. And it's true, we need to add on at least one more bedroom. A play room or family room would be nice, too. But I love my house. It's quiet here. We have lots of natural light. Our diningroom is big and we have a long rectangular table that seats all of us easily (and with the leaf, fitting a few more kids would be no trouble at all).

Travel. Or lack of it. Now, this does bother me some. I want us to have great family vacations, building our memories and closeness. Before our trip to AZ two weeks ago, we hadn't gone anywhere in three years. Then, we had gone to a a family reunion in Montana and it was great. I would love to get back to the east coast and visit family and show my kids American history up close. I'd like us to travel up to Oregon every summer to visit my brothers and my uncle. And there are many other destinations I'd like to explore as a family. For now, though, I am content that we are going to China soon, and while an adoption trip is no vacation, this will be a huge family event, building memories that are priceless.

I suppose I'd be rolling in the dough if I didn't have a heart for the orphan, the widow, for those with disabilities, but my life would be fruitless, barren, and a very sad and pointless existence.

And we are known by our fruit. I much rather it be known that I help where I can.

I have grown a lot and need a lot less to be happy. Family and following through on what God places on my heart are the only importance in my life. He has a plan for each and every one of us. Often, it's not what we would have chosen for ourselves, but it is something much better.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

Sunday Catch-Up

I skipped my Wednesday Walk this week. In fact, I totally forgot about my weekly reflections on my walk with God until Thursday morning . Not that I haven't been talking to Him, praying and praising--I did plenty of that during our weekend away--I can't begin to describe the battle I had with fear as I approached the 6 hour drive back home through barren desert with a car that had acted up upon our arrival in AZ and my precious babes counting on me for their safety. However, by the time I was 40 minutes into tumble weed and seguro, I managed to lay every fearful thought captive unto the Lord. Much praise there!!

And then on Monday, there was the nerve-wracking dental visit for the girls (Maddie always gets traumatic blisters inside her mouth when she has her teeth cleaned and she has just come off of 19 months of constant blisters--due in part to what I have discovered is a food allergy. . .)which included the discovery that Maddie has 11 teeth coming in -- 7 year old and 12 year old molars all coming in now.

And one of my students, whom I have had in my case load for 3 years, is very ill. I am praying the round of chemo she had is working, but she doesn't look well and as of this writing, has missed school the past 3 days, which is unlike her.

All of this mixed into my daily walk kept me in near constant prayer and praise.

But I know He is working and that all things will come together for our good. It's so wonderful to finally be in a place that is free of doubt.

Their First Concert

Arizona wasn't all rolling tumble weed and seguro cactus:) Nor was it spoiled by the car trouble that could have been so much worse (Thank You, Lord!).

On the road.

Pool party.

There's a new sheriff in town.

Before I realized God's intentions to whittle the pride off of me and help me to grow closer to Him, I purchased the girls' Christmas present. I am so tired of stuff, and toys that become stuff, so when I saw that the Fresh Beat Band was coming in concert--any my girls LOVE the FBB--I knew that would make a great, meaningful, family experience gift. However, the ticket prices for the San Diego performance were outrageous--$83.00 for nose bleeders! And I just couldn't bring myself to pay that. Then, a fellow adoptive mom contacted me and told me that the band was coming to Mesa, AZ and that good seats cost $30.00! I purchased 4, bringing Nana with us, of course:) The girls loved the performance and it did turn out to be an excellent gift.

DTC

Dossier-to-China. Today. WOOOOOOHOO!!
Soon, I'll receive my log-in-date, which will initiate much needed paperwork on China's side of things. We are hoping to travel in May, which is a reasonable expectation. So, about 2-3 months to raise $4000. Of course, God doesn't need that much time to get it done. And He just might keep me waiting until the last possible moment, but Wonders of Wonders, that no longer bothers me.

Arizona

Much that could have gone wrong did. To the point where my mom was kind of stunned--me, I'm getting used to these supernatural challenges. I do wonder what God is preparing me for, and after a few moments of faltering, I hope I have strengthened my faith further. I definitely do NOT want to go around that mountain again. So I hope I've learned, that I'm stronger, and closer to God. We definitely would not have made it home without Him.

The girls had a good time. Ava loved the cactus and both girls enjoyed swimming at the hotel. Of course, their Christmas present went over very well--the reason we went to AZ. I will follow up with pictures later.

Mommy, Maddie and Ava at the park. We're trying to simplify, have more fun and less demands on our time. So we've put a trip to the park into our work/school week as well as a bike ride to the lakes once a week, too.

Wednesday Walk

Trials. We've had more than a few over the past couple of years. I have grown stronger in faith as a result, and closer to God. I have become much better at getting still and listening for Him. And the peace that has grown in me, braided so beautifully with a strength that can only come from Him, has been my saving grace on more than one occasion.

One "trial" that I haven't spoken much about is my daughter's health. My big girl has had blisters in her mouth almost every single day for the past year, and sporadically in the year prior to that. I have had her to the pediatrican many, many times. I had her to the specialist, who was confounded that their interventions weren't working. I have removed foods from her diet, and reintroduced them, tried an antiviral medication that was patchy at best in effectiveness, and have now requested a referral to a peds allergist. She is the sweetest child, a great sis and friend, but she has had it. Now the blisters are accompanied by fever and sore throats and tantrums (who can blame her, right). I am heading back to the pediatrician to ask for antibiotics, because it's possible, after such a long time, that the virus has become bacterial and entered her bloodstream. And this makes me so sad and angry--I have been fighting for my child for two years now and just feel that we shouldn't have gotten to this point. God is a healing God. And this week I am clinging to.

I started writing this post a week ago. To my utter joy, it has become a post about faith and God's delieverance, and His amazing healing, rather than the my attempts to remain steadfast in faith. On Friday night, my daughter turned to me and said, "I don't have a blister. Not even one." The look on her face still makes me want to weep. Maddie has been without a blister going on 5 days now. Yesterday, she had a tiny blister appear and then vanish within an hour. She had a fever last Thursday evening, but none since. And no melt downs since, either. She has been off Motrin for 3 days and counting. An answered prayer, definitely. His Word is real clear on doing what I can do and He'll do the rest. So even while I was keeping the faith, and struggling, I've had Maddie on Lysine that I mix into her yogurt twice a day; put her back on the acylovir, but I adjusted the dose down so she wouldn't experience side effects, and I removed tomatoes and citrus from her diet. I think the tomatoes/citrus were the real culprit and that the Lysine is helpful, too. Maddie and I are both hoping we can discontinue the acylovir, but we will wait for 3 months free of blisters and fever before we try that. Keep the faith--God answers:)